“Out of My Heart and Into His” Is A Life Reflection As A Whole
Out of My Heart and Into His is written by my mother-in-law, Karen Rode. It is her life story during her journey through married life and motherhood. Her dream started when she was a little girl — to go to heaven and be with Jesus. But God began to shape her into His dream, into the woman He created her to be. Although Mom’s life wasn’t perfect and though she was shaken by doubts and troubles along the way, she maintained her faith in God.
The author grew up with loving parents on a farm outside Pullman, Washington. She and her two brothers and sister were raised in a traditional family home and attended a small country nondenominational church. As Mom grew into her teens, her pursuit of God intensified which led her to a Christian group focused on deliverance. Mom moved to California to be part of that group and met her husband there. After knowing each other for a few months they wed.
Her Struggles in Her Marriage Life
Meeting a husband in a church isn’t a guarantee that this man will be a wonderful husband. In working for the ideal of unity in a marriage, it certainly helps to share the same beliefs and background as Mom and my father-in-law did — praising God and helping people. They had their happy moments as a family but my father-in-law’s controlling behavior sometimes made life difficult.
Reading Mom’s story in the earlier chapters brought me to a roller coaster ride of emotions. At first, laughter then tears. I couldn’t stop my tears because I could feel the pain and struggle my mother-in-law went through as a young wife and mother. I identified with her because some of her struggles I also experience and I only have two children. She had eleven!
My Mom had a wonderful father who sent her $100 to spend on herself. Having a family to back you up and support you is so helpful. I’m sure if my father were well he would be the same.
Building a family of your own is surely a hard thing to do no matter how small your family. The author is blessed to have a family that is there for her while she is trying to build her own. Mom had a family who understood her and kept communicating with her on how she is doing. She had a family that she could turn to when she needed them. It was in this part of her book that I couldn’t stop weeping. I’m away from my family and friends in the Philippines. Moving to America — an unknown and new place — knowing no one except yourself and your husband who is also sometimes controlling isn’t an easy journey. It can be lonely.
A Life Reflection
As I read Out of My Heart and Into His, I could see how in some ways my married life was turning out like my mother-in-law’s. When you’re always hurt you become cold and the fights are the same over and over.
In a family, it is mostly the woman who knows that the relationship is starting to deteriorate and it needs fixing but sometimes the man doesn’t care enough to do something about it. We women are relationship-oriented and always trying to find ways to make things better. But when men don’t listen and it gets to the point that the woman is done she will walk away without looking back.
I think walking away is better than being in a relationship and letting your kids witness the fights.
Having eleven children, of course, meant my mother-in-law was very busy with the physical demands of caring for a large family. Karen does write honestly of the areas she felt she lacked as a mom — areas of empathy and emotional bonding with her children. Karen was a stay at home mom so my husband had a different experience growing up than I had. My mother worked all my growing up years which meant she locked time and emotional bond with us. My sister and I did the household chores plus taking care of our younger brother.
Passed To Their Generations
Reading my mother-in-law’s book and being part of the family now helps explain to me why my hubby seems lacking in the area of empathy. Nate always says you’ll get what your parents have shared and thought of you growing up. That is true but we always have a choice. My mother was cold and unfeeling to us sometimes, but I feel I am the opposite towards my children. I support my kids in every way I can and I read a lot of parenting books and psychology books on how to raise and manage children with certain behaviors.
Out of My Heart and Into His is a wonderful book for women in early adulthood. I always believe in learning the mistakes of others. Young women reading Mom’s journey can gain tips on how to look for a partner in life and how to make things different when you have a controlling husband. If you are already married with children, you’ll find in Out of My Heart and Into His tips on raising children and solving problems with your spouse. You can compare your journey with Karen’s. Is her journey helpful to you, or is there a better way?
This book will give you a window into my husband’s family growing up. What’s it like to be in a household with so many brothers and sisters? And you’ll have a window into my mother-in-law’s journey in learning to be the daughter of Jesus — how Jesus molded her into the woman she is today.
You’ll learn a lot of Bible verses by reading this book as Karen relates her journey through scripture.
For women who are religious and believe in God, this book is for you. It doesn’t matter your religious affiliation. You can still learn something from Karen’s journey. Have a tissue and or handkerchief ready. There are times you’ll be weeping, and in the next second, you’ll be laughing!
It took me a long time for me to finished reading this book as I have to rest from reading. It emotionally hit home to me, but glad I was finally able to do this and share this with you all.
Motherhood is a sweet journey. It can be hard, but hugging our children every day is the most important thing we can do as a parent.
Don’t expect someone to be there for you 24/7. Learn to love yourself fully. In doing so, you’ll still be able to focus and continue your life even if people say negative things about you.
No one is perfect, and we can’t please everyone all the time. What we can do is find our own light and shine it towards the people who need it.
Find your passion and pursue it to be who you are in your journey in life!
Children have different personalities, but it is us parents who need to know how to handle them and shape them.
Know when to move forward and when to say no to protect your inner self.
We can’t give to others when our own cup is empty. It is always better to take care of our own selves first.
Love yourself with all your heart! That’s the best thing we can do for our own selves!
Out of My Heart and Into His by Karen Rode can be purchased in paperback or ebook from Amazon.
Another article related to this topic
COVID-19: How Can We Live An Everyday Legacy During This Pandemic?
COVID-19: How Can We Live An Everyday Legacy During This Pandemic?
I love that reading Out of My Heart and Into His not only brought you better understanding of your mother in law, but also of your husband. I feel people don’t open up enough about marital struggles and that prevents others from growing by avoiding some of those mistakes.
What a heartwarming book to read, April! This is so touching and will have to order this and give my full opinion then. Reading other people’s experiences and hardships are a great way to learn life’s lessons. Thank you for sharing this wonderful post!
I do agree and thank you for reading. I am glad mom wrote this book and I have the time to read it and assists in my own journey.
I can totally relate to the point – don’t expect someone be there 24/7, sometimes we have to be independent in some situation:’) It may not be easy but that’s life…
Josie | The Cheetah Buzz
The lessons are so deep! I am on the journey of self-discovery after surviving a tumultuous relationship so I definitely get the not being able to give from an empty cup. I feel so drained and empty from love and now I am trying to build myself back up by taking care of my self-care needs. Thanks for this xxx
You are welcome, Josie, and I hope you feel better soon. I know the feeling, and I am praying you will get it back soon.